All right, I got my hands on the Slater Formulary, the online version that doesn’t actually give you the proportions for everything. But that doesn’t matter, and I’ll show you why. Here are a couple random formulas:

Zawba Powder
Brown [That’s the color you are supposed to add]
Vanilla powder
Thyme
Wintergreen
Almond
A special blend which is used to create dissension between lovers and very close friends. Sprinkle on those individuals you wish to cast a spell upon. This is a black magick blend.

The hell! Vanilla has long been used for love; thyme to keep money in your house and bring peace of mind; almond – well, I was taught to use the oil as the base for magical oils because of its mild fragrance and long shelf life. It stands for God’s vigilance and swift response, according to Wikipedia. Wintergreen’s magical attributes add zap to your love, money and sexual life. Yeah, I can see the dissension now:

“Dammit, I love you more than you love me.” “No, I love you more!”

“B*tch! What part of ‘buy municipal bonds’ don’t you understand?”

Yeah, that’s gonna work really well.

Let’s try one more:

Shoe String Root Powder
Vetivert
Patchouli
Sprinkle around the home to protect the inhabitants against death. Also brings extreme good luck to those who play cards as it invokes lucky spiritual forces.

Well, the latter might be true: Some people use vetiver for love; patchouli works for love, money and protection. But how the hell can he call it “Shoe String Powder” and not include any Devil’s Shoe String? That’s one of the best protective herbs I know.

Slater’s either yankin’ your chain or talking through his hat. I’m just sayin.’

2 thoughts on “Oh my Lord: or, Slater, Please!

  1. LOL that’s so funny, but yeah Slater has a poor poor reputation among anyone who has read his book and his “formulas” just don’t hold water.

    dean

  2. I know. cat yronwode hosts a much more instructive article here. The thing is, I found the formulary in the files section of a Yahoo group I joined recently — so I guess Slater still gets some play.

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